Links & kinks
Where else can you find Pnårp on the unfurled-wide web? Pnårp is everywhere, dearies! It’s phlogistically fantastical!
4chan
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2024-03-03 05:49:05
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Fark NotNewsletter: Have you been Farking for half your life?
My own web blob pnarp.com is 24 too. Way back in 1999, I toyed with the idea of taking up tree farming, but then I learned that bananas don't grow on trees, so lost interest. (All I wanted was an unlimited supply of bananas.) So I decided to take up a lot of space and other people's time instead. And that's when I decided to take up blogging. And the rest is history.
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I blame Clinton. And my nose.
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Æ, Ø, and Å, three letters the world can’t understand. The Internet is killing the Danish language
å?
Phillip Norbert Årp knows all about the letter å! It’s all jammed up there in the middle of my name!
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Hilarity always ensues. It’s just a matter of time.
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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page. (Warning comic sans)
2013-09-04 12:26:30
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I present you Pnårp. An insane blog that exists and constantly gets updated since 1999
2012-03-23 10:54:44
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A friend found this sign in a local coffee shop. So that’s why we’re in a drought!
Like… with giant hairdryers or something?
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It’s shit like this, road signs
This kind of thing makes the squirrels come out of my ears.
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The Quietest Place On Earth Will Cause You To Hallucinate In 45 Minutes
But… (Score:1)
2013-12-09 13:25 (#45638555)
…what’ll it do if I already hallucinate every day? I’m hallucinating that I’m locked in my closet with Alyssa Milano right now!
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New Dinosaur ‘Siats Meekerorum’ Discovered In Utah
New dinosaurs? (Score:1)
2013-12-01 05:46 (#45565999)
They’re still making new dinosaurs?!
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How Blockbuster Could Have Owned Netflix
But instead… (Score:1)
2013-11-21 19:01 (#45483637)
…they went out of business. I’ve been waiting for this for fifteen years! That’s what you get for charging me that $1.50 late fee in 1998, suckers!!! Hahahaha!!! Where’s your god now!?!?
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Physicists Plan to Build a Bigger LHC
Bigger? (Score:1)
2013-11-20 16:27 (#45473335)
An LHC the size of a garden gnome should be big enough for anyone.
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Scientists Says Jellyfish Are Taking Over the Oceans
Crunchy! (Score:1)
2013-11-18 16:49 (#45455423)
But I like jellyfish! They’re crunchy and tasty and so tentacly good!
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6TB Helium-Filled Hard Drives Take Flight
But (Score:1)
2013-11-16 09:14 (#45441761)
But will it make my voice all squeaky if I breathe too close to it?
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Wikipedia-Sponsored Pilot Study Lauds Wikipedia Accuracy
Wikipedia (Score:0)
2012-08-02 20:05 (#40860437)
I always have wonderful [pnarp.com] experiences using Wikipedia for information. I sometimes even survive without major injury!
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ESA Discovers Unexpected ‘Haze’ of Microwave Transmissions
Ovens? (Score:0)
2012-02-14 14:36 (#39032317)
A few years ago my town started making people dispose of their old microwave ovens at a special “transfer” location at the town dump, rather than just letting us bury them in our backyard like they used to. I’ve always wondered what they did with all those microwave ovens. Now I know.
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I prefer to listen to recorded media via …
Earbuds? (Score:0)
2011-04-15 19:57 (#35832424)
Wait, those little nubby headphones are supposed to be earbuds?
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Re:Underground caverns? (Score:0)
2011-04-13 19:05 (#35811042)
Indeed. They are far too easily targeted by ICBMs.
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Uses for garden gnomes! (Score:0)
2011-04-11 20:43 (#35785704)
I employ a small team of garden gnomes to do my backups for me. It works wonderfully: Their underground caverns make excellent secure off-site backup locations.
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Spacecraft Sends First Image From Mercury’s Orbit
Re:This comment approved by 4 out of 5 squirrels (Score:1)
2011-03-31 02:10 (#35673902)
But what about that time I got my head wedged in a railing…? Was that aliens too…?
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Spacecraft Sends First Image From Mercury’s Orbit
This comment approved by 4 out of 5 squirrels (Score:1, Funny)
2011-03-30 21:38 (#35671508)
There are six key questions NASA hopes to answer during Messenger’s year-long orbit of Mercury: why is Mercury so dense;
Aliens.
what is the planet’s geological history;
Aliens.
what is the nature of Mercury’s magnetic field;
Alien warp engines.
what is the structure of Mercury’s core;
Alien space station.
what are the unusual materials (ice?) at Mercury’s poles;
Alien ice.
and what volatiles are important at Mercury?
Aliens farting.
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Journal: Garden Gnomes Stealing My Thoughts!
2005-09-23 01:10
I’d write something here, something useful, something interesting, something obtuse and acutely profound at the same time, but for one problem: the invidously incipient garden gnomes steal my thoughts. Whining and pining, wheedling and needling, they all come, one by one, and pluck the thoughts out of my juicy cerebellum and parade around town in them, naked as an octothorpe in a January wind! Babbling, they wrench the individual thoughts from my head, flabbling, they run away, away, trailing my ideas and memories behind them, laughing and snickering they go. Oh, how they go.
I wear the fez, the protective fez that I won long ago in a Sicilian rat-fighting contest, but the gnomes still—even still!—steal my thoughts, one by one, by the bushel and by the yard, mocking me as they shocklingly allude to invidous occultism and foreign millenia. The gnomes, they sicken me. Garden gnomes, garden gnomes, we all fall down!
Pnårp also has lots of friends & enemies on the hurled-aside web! Check ’em out, too—before the gnomes get them! Or before the gnomes get you!
These weirdos like me for some reason and put me in their directories:
And these weirdos scribble out lots of their own bloggery all the time:
And this weird stuff is just weird itself: