Subscribe to all of my blatherings right in your wob brewser!Subscribe to my latest blatherings right in your wob brewser! Pnårp in print! Made from 35% recycled toilet paper! Send Pnårp your garrulous praise… or excretory condemnation! The less you tweet? The more you toot! Dreaming widely about my page! Tweet! Tweet! Twat! Livin’ it up… on a living journal! A whole book full of my faces?
You’re my favorite visitor!

Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Briefcase! Gatorade!!

Fudged up against February 13, 2005.

“Fellow citizens, without solicitation on my part, I have been chosen by the free and voluntary suffrages of my countrymen to the most honorable and most responsible office on Earth. I am deeply impressed with gratitude for the confidence reposed in me. Honored with this distinguished consideration at an earlier period of life than any of my predecessors, I can not disguise the diffidence with which I am about to enter on the discharge of my official duties…”

I listened intently to James Knox Polk’s inaugural address, for the seventeenth time this week. It told me nothing about where the Troobles were. I wondered what he meant by his “responsible office.” I wondered if he were talking about the popsicle factory on Main Street in Rhode Island, or the lipstick production plant in Saugus, Michigan. I also wondered if Saugus was even in Michigan, or if it was in Oregon, or Guam. Where is my MP3 player, with the doughnuts and Alyssa Milano? Briefcase!!

Guam is a nice place to live. James Knox Polk said so in 1978.

I decided that existing among the stars, even using the quasars and pulsars, was useless; I would not find any Englebee Troobles there. Down to Earth I returned. Something smelled like a burning Pikachu as I reentered the world. Why did I have a box on my face? Gatorade!!!