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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning doofuses

My life as a computer

Computed on January 14, 2024

The tapering of taped cans and candies

Canned on January 7, 2024

The Aroostook Roo Store

Rued the day of September 17, 2023

By fish or by Finn

Finished after September 10, 2023

Corn gone bacon and eggs

Consterned on September 3, 2023

A fresh set of gnome latrines

Spun on July 23, 2023

Dogs that ate backwards

Reversed on June 25, 2023

A monolithic dump

Pumped and dumped on April 30, 2023

The day ended before it began

Endorsed on March 19, 2023

You are a crazy person

Maddened on November 20, 2022

Yet still bereft of meaning

Creamed on September 25, 2022

History looked at me this week

Transported on September 4, 2022

Pinguid penguins, disparate parrots, and a Studebaker

Basted on August 28, 2022

On any given day

Plotted and schemed on August 21, 2022

Up to my ass in alligators

Endangered on August 7, 2022

Gnocco after gnocco

Knocked on on July 10, 2022

A stubby little short week

Trolloped around on April 24, 2022

A wanted carton of wontons

Trotted out on April 10, 2022

Seven point two hundred

Committed on March 27, 2022

A hilarious pair of ducks

Redpilled on March 13, 2022

The door slammed in my face

Slammed on January 30, 2022

Vigorously shaking every Solanum dulcamara

Vigorously shook before December 19, 2021

Vigorously shaking every ficus tree

Shook before December 12, 2021

Shouting at every houseplant

Shouted at before December 5, 2021

Losing weight at the lost-and-found

Bonked on September 19, 2021

And then I’ll fart one more time, and…

Intruded upon August 29, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Not a typewriter

Tabulated on July 25, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

The geese were angry

Angered before November 4, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

The hobnailery on Hobgoblin Street

Borfnagled on March 6, 2011

Happy birthday, Alyssa Milano!

Feet worshipped on December 19, 2010

The fnord plan

Executed before April 11, 2010

New Gardegnomia

Navigated to on July 30, 2006

Music erupted from my bed cushions

Cosigned on April 24, 2005