Subscribe to all of my blatherings right in your wob brewser!Subscribe to my latest blatherings right in your wob brewser! Pnårp in print! Made from 35% recycled toilet paper! Send Pnårp your garrulous praise… or excretory condemnation! The less you tweet? The more you toot! Dreaming widely about my page! Tweet! Tweet! Twat! Livin’ it up… on a living journal! A whole book full of my faces? A whole book full of my faces?
You’re my favorite visitor!

Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning urine

So many questions

Trebled on April 21, 2024

The case of the windy toilet

Manicured on March 10, 2024

Watering the water clocks

Watered on January 28, 2024

My life as a computer

Computed on January 14, 2024

Whitewalls, chromedomes, and an asshat with jingle bells

Whitened on December 24, 2023

A quacking bush

Bushwhacked on November 12, 2023

The Aroostook Roo Store

Rued the day of September 17, 2023

By fish or by Finn

Finished after September 10, 2023

Cwæþ the Pnårp

Jactitated on August 27, 2023

Being a little bit taller

Racked on April 16, 2023

The day ended before it began

Endorsed on March 19, 2023

I am my thoughts… I am time

Annuated on January 1, 2023

Toppings on the bottom?

Bottomed out on December 18, 2022

And then the flies danced

Smelt on October 2, 2022

Yet still bereft of meaning

Creamed on September 25, 2022

Up to my ass in alligators

Endangered on August 7, 2022

A stack of dictionaries, a goat, and the ensuing manure

Stacked high on June 26, 2022

A squiddy meal, a goosey girl, and moles of gnomes

Wriggled on June 5, 2022

Whittling the knittery

Quavered on May 8, 2022

Flogging the dinosaur

Flailed around on May 1, 2022

An arduous, odorous, ordurous affair

Cannibalized on February 27, 2022

Three-eyed gnomes, a lighthouse, and a pair of feet

Erred on February 13, 2022

Hard avocados and soft stones

Ripened on January 23, 2022

Nothing happened

Obliviated on January 9, 2022

Shouting at every houseplant

Shouted at before December 5, 2021

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

A Sefernday to ſurely remember

Obſerved on October 24, 2021

Dugong, budong, hotdog, and hoe

Frowned at on October 3, 2021

Today I was being a…

Squirreled on August 8, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

Keeping those goats down in the hole

Bored on April 18, 2021

From Commodus to Vespasian—

Detruded on April 11, 2021

Maybe it was the location

Tripped out on March 21, 2021

Mooey, mooey, moo!

Lowed at on December 9, 2012

Horses, drugs, and some Volvos

Revolved around December 2, 2012

A paean to funnels

Funneled on November 25, 2012

The nauga war

Tanned on October 14, 2012

The turtle herds of insomnia

NōDōz’d on August 12, 2012

And the neckties writhed

Spiraled around July 29, 2012

The ÅSS Goose from the Machine

Bageled on July 22, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

I am the humperdumperdink!

Dumped and dinked on June 10, 2012

Vox clamantis in deserto

Cheddared on May 6, 2012

To order a coffee

Caffeinated on March 25, 2012

Axons across beard-seconds of darkness

Stretched out February 19, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

A sleigh ride to the North Pole

Kringled on December 25, 2011

A journey to Upper Silesia

Gruelled on December 18, 2011

A sally to the Kremlin

Red squared on December 11, 2011

A jaunt to Washington, D.C.

Filibustered on December 4, 2011

Schtumpfenfrumpt!

Stumped on October 16, 2011

A snootful of donuts

Imbibed before October 2, 2011

A paean to panic

Glibbered about on September 25, 2011

Gnomes? In my photocopier?

Litigated before September 18, 2011

The toadskin kazoo

Toads skinned on September 4, 2011

Uneventful, boring, and bland

Nothing happened on August 28, 2011

A skeezle-wumpus? In my cabinets?

Marred on August 14, 2011

The day ended

Gibbered about on August 7, 2011

Just shaving the dog

Preened on July 31, 2011

Rotating in place

Caligulated on March 20, 2011

The Christ-O-Mart on Crunkner Boulevard

Transubstantiated before January 16, 2011

An alabasterously magnificent find

Found before December 5, 2010

The frozen Pnårp

Last thing I remembered on October 24, 2010

Phbthphbthphbthphbththth!

Flatulated on October 3, 2010

Gnomes destroying my brain and kidneys

Urinated on on July 18, 2010

Oh, the serendipity!

Squelched through on May 30, 2010

Thousands of Eggmen against one little Pnårp

Destalinized on May 2, 2010

A plan is hatched

Hatched right before April 4, 2010

Return from the Brundlebeyond

Disgorged on March 7, 2010

The Brundlesphere

Entangled on July 20, 2008

The perfunctory margin of disbelief, part II

Reified on June 29, 2008

Requiem for a haberdasher

Eulogized on June 8, 2008

Plårp, Plårp, Plårp!

Lopped off on July 29, 2007

131,072 Schmongeloid conscripts

Decimated on March 4, 2007

The perfect symmetry of a letter

Excreted slightly before December 18, 2005

A visit to Eigentoria

Emigrated on November 6, 2005

I had failed

Hidden above my bed on October 17, 1999

Am I lost!? Am I low on oil!?

Hydrogenated for April 11, 1999

I took the pile of animal feces out of my garage

Electrolyzed for March 14, 1999