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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning gonads

Morning again?

Mourned on February 11, 2024

Watering the water clocks

Watered on January 28, 2024

My life as a computer

Computed on January 14, 2024

The splaying of resplendent splendiferousness

Cobbled together on December 31, 2023

A byte nybbled a word, and then…

Nibbled on December 10, 2023

Snow crabs and snow leopards

Piled up upon December 3, 2023

Musings on the salad of chicken and eggs

Emulsified on November 5, 2023

A real nobody

Fettered on October 15, 2023

A week of weekdays and their horrors

Manacled on October 8, 2023

A bolo tie and a blogging accident

Haberdashed on September 24, 2023

The Aroostook Roo Store

Rued the day of September 17, 2023

By fish or by Finn

Finished after September 10, 2023

Corn gone bacon and eggs

Consterned on September 3, 2023

Negotiating a goats-for-oats deal

Abnegated on August 20, 2023

Dugongs, bleating, and a meowing Nurdlebutt

Bellyached on August 13, 2023

Playing a katydid like a fiddle

Diddled on August 6, 2023

Rejecting both Church Latin and the Ciceronian

Conjugated on July 30, 2023

Today I was being even more, more or less

Been on July 2, 2023

Dogs that ate backwards

Reversed on June 25, 2023

Chicken dickin’ good!

Kennedy-fried on June 18, 2023

Crap! Carp! Scrap! Scarp!

Sworn on May 21, 2023

Tuna surprise

Surprised on May 14, 2023

Being a little bit taller

Racked on April 16, 2023

Being six feet tall

Fathomed on April 9, 2023

To catch a fly

Lashed on February 26, 2023

My spaghetti trees had all flowered

Disassembled on February 19, 2023

And the rest was history

Revised for February 12, 2023

The house that Pnårp built

Stacked like cordwood on February 5, 2023

A mystery of hasps and coat hangers

Fastened on January 29, 2023

Thinking for myself

Cerebrated on January 22, 2023

No more barriers to cross

Surpassed on January 15, 2023

I am my thoughts… I am time

Annuated on January 1, 2023

A real galleyshnogger of a Christmas

Dove in on December 25, 2022

Toppings on the bottom?

Bottomed out on December 18, 2022

Thanksgiving with the McBorbleys

Thanks given on November 27, 2022

Change you can be leaf in

Bogged down on November 13, 2022

With a ploot, ploot, ploot!

Born on November 6, 2022

A draught horse, serendipity, and a bankruptcy

Forstraught on October 30, 2022

I wish my spoons were stronger

Snooped on October 23, 2022

Autumn had arrived

Floundered on October 16, 2022

The deep toaster

Smeared on October 9, 2022

And then the flies danced

Smelt on October 2, 2022

Yet still bereft of meaning

Creamed on September 25, 2022

A veritable trash dump of words

Whipped on September 18, 2022

Pinguid penguins, disparate parrots, and a Studebaker

Basted on August 28, 2022

Catastrophes—but no anastrophe

Mishappened on August 14, 2022

Squirrels, squeeorling, syrup of squill, and squee

Cocked up on July 24, 2022

Tuck in flap to close

Knocked up on July 17, 2022

The long, greasy road

Lubed up on July 3, 2022

A stack of dictionaries, a goat, and the ensuing manure

Stacked high on June 26, 2022

Wernicke, Broca, and a two-week, drug-fueled bender

Refueled on June 19, 2022

Dogging the Balphonse

Hemidemisemiquavered on May 29, 2022

Batting the package

Semiquavered on May 15, 2022

Flogging the dinosaur

Flailed around on May 1, 2022

An exaggeratedly long week

Galloped about on April 17, 2022

A curious nine-day week

Dialed on April 3, 2022

The twentieth best day of my life

Easily understood on March 20, 2022

A hilarious pair of ducks

Redpilled on March 13, 2022

Three-eyed gnomes, a lighthouse, and a pair of feet

Erred on February 13, 2022

Carpathian Carpentry Gnomes? In my kitchen?

Hammered on February 6, 2022

The door slammed in my face

Slammed on January 30, 2022

New years and new neighbors

Bunted on January 2, 2022

Vigorously shaking every Solanum dulcamara

Vigorously shook before December 19, 2021

Vigorously shaking every ficus tree

Shook before December 12, 2021

Shouting at every houseplant

Shouted at before December 5, 2021

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

The Dingleberry–Hampsterist–Schmarnocks war

Embattled on November 21, 2021

A Sefernday to ſurely remember

Obſerved on October 24, 2021

Plantago delenda est

Planted on October 17, 2021

The pink, sticky day ended

Chaptered and versed on September 12, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Today I was being a…

Squirreled on August 8, 2021

Time to draw the bull

Ejaculated on August 1, 2021

Not a typewriter

Tabulated on July 25, 2021

Fish upon the land

Phished on July 18, 2021

My arm just follows them

Detached on July 11, 2021

To narfle the gömböc

Balanced on June 27, 2021

Too many Sundays

Quintupled on May 30, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

Keeping those goats down in the hole

Bored on April 18, 2021

An arpeggio for Snarpegon

Spatchcocked on March 28, 2021

Christmas, goats, and the fiscal cliff

Goat got on December 30, 2012

This coming Friday…

Prognosticated after December 16, 2012

A paean to funnels

Funneled on November 25, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

The geese were angry

Angered before November 4, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

The nauga war

Tanned on October 14, 2012

Meals and utensils and straws, oh my!

Bluely rinsed on October 7, 2012

Livin’ large in the large intestine

Emboweled on September 23, 2012

The ÅSS Goose from the Machine

Bageled on July 22, 2012

Planet of the geese

Honked at on July 15, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

The Bagel Nebula, you stinky monkeys!

Humped and dumped on June 17, 2012

My skin was thinking

Considered for June 3, 2012

Hoarsely the Pnårp sang

Horsed around on May 13, 2012

Vox clamantis in deserto

Cheddared on May 6, 2012

A box! A box! A box of…

Puttered about on April 15, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

To order a coffee

Caffeinated on March 25, 2012

Toad rental—cheap!

Rented on March 18, 2012

Axons across beard-seconds of darkness

Stretched out February 19, 2012

Thoughts diverging from reality

Converging on January 29, 2012

And then the cold cuts danced

Ronpauled on January 15, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

A sally to the Kremlin

Red squared on December 11, 2011

Goatburping and speechifying

Blustered about before November 20, 2011

Grunting and squeaking in the goatburping park

Soil sampled on November 13, 2011

Like a herd of turtles

Frightened on November 6, 2011

Schtumpfenfrumpt!

Stumped on October 16, 2011

A stick of pepperoni a day

Bordured on August 21, 2011

A skeezle-wumpus? In my cabinets?

Marred on August 14, 2011

Disgorgement and cheddar

Squassated on July 24, 2011

Just so he could moo at someone

Percolated on July 3, 2011

The end of doodlewhacker pie

Bloomed on June 26, 2011

Moobly Sefernday!

Borndwiddied on June 19, 2011

What the heck… is bothering me?

Chanted on June 12, 2011

Reflecting on corn gone wrong

Paroled on May 15, 2011

Hnnnngggghhhh!

Strained on May 1, 2011

The tight, grimacing face

Impacted before April 17, 2011

Cool beans

Beaned on March 27, 2011

Rotating in place

Caligulated on March 20, 2011

Pnårp.com!

Crossing Pnårp Road on March 13, 2011

The hobnailery on Hobgoblin Street

Borfnagled on March 6, 2011

A dark and spammy night

LARTed on February 20, 2011

The Christ-O-Mart on Crunkner Boulevard

Transubstantiated before January 16, 2011

Fluffernutter… or treacle?

Stickied on January 2, 2011

Back to Pam & Meg’s

Goatmulched on December 12, 2010

Ravna and a tub of port wine cheese spread

Slathered all over on November 21, 2010

Ollanthorpe Memorial Hospital

Atrophied before October 10, 2010

Skipping Wednesday

Slid past on September 12, 2010

Death by simultaneous drowning and dehydration

Dumbled for August 29, 2010

Tater-totting crunkfire

Clapped on… clapped off on August 22, 2010

The disastrous ballad of Monica Lewinski’s feet

Shattered before August 15, 2010

Gnomes destroying my brain and kidneys

Urinated on on July 18, 2010

Technicolor horse testicles

Nuked on June 27, 2010

A little pedicatio

Irrumated on May 16, 2010

I had eggs today!

Oviposited on April 18, 2010

Return from the Brundlebeyond

Disgorged on March 7, 2010

Alyssa Milano & the new adventures of Hitler

Snickerdickered on March 30, 2008

The blaze continues unabated

Immolated on March 16, 2008

Suddenly ablaze

Ignited on March 9, 2008

A whiz and a giggle

Whizgiggled at on February 3, 2008

Today is January 27

Punched on January 27, 2008

Spaceworthy guardsquirrels

Decompressed on December 9, 2007

Free at last

Self-addressed and stamped on December 2, 2007

Further visages of feet-&-toes

Hieroticalized on May 6, 2007

The wall gong exhibition

Molested on June 11, 2006

A cock-up, to be sure

Erected on June 4, 2006

The haberdashery, act IV

Wanted on March 26, 2006

Hobnobbishly bamboozled, she said

Interrupted before February 5, 2006

Today being Christmas…

Made merry on December 25, 2005

Caught in a wet noodling contest

Noodled on October 16, 2005

Troobles, long and hard

Deluged on August 7, 2005

Eigenfactor

Given to charity prior to May 22, 2005

Fell in a pit (again)

Masticated on May 1, 2005

Alyssa Milano still has very cute feet

Reeducated on February 20, 2005

A brass knob had fallen on my head

Belched out on September 26, 1999

Someone accused me of screwing a pheasant

Remixed before September 12, 1999

Without a tongue or a penis

Reticulated and sun-dried on September 5, 1999