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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning toilets

One moron’s opinion

Opined for May 19, 2024

Never put a fish in your car

Wrapped on May 12, 2024

So many questions

Trebled on April 21, 2024

An antelope with a pair of cantaloupes

Hight on April 7, 2024

There’s a joke in here somewhere

Pedicured on March 17, 2024

The case of the windy toilet

Manicured on March 10, 2024

Pig-headed and ham-fisted

Cleaved on March 3, 2024

Seven point three hundred

Paltered on February 25, 2024

Watering the water clocks

Watered on January 28, 2024

Shaken and stir crazy

Swept on January 21, 2024

A byte nybbled a word, and then…

Nibbled on December 10, 2023

Musings on the salad of chicken and eggs

Emulsified on November 5, 2023

An oversized capybara, a staccato cadence

Hobbled on October 22, 2023

A real nobody

Fettered on October 15, 2023

A week of weekdays and their horrors

Manacled on October 8, 2023

Rejecting both Church Latin and the Ciceronian

Conjugated on July 30, 2023

A fresh set of gnome latrines

Spun on July 23, 2023

Omental cakes and tires (or a blunch of underwear)

Portended on July 16, 2023

Ratiocination and a rat

Bugged off on July 9, 2023

It doesn’t have to—but I always do

Needn’t on June 4, 2023

Crap! Crabapple! Crapapple!

Cursed on May 28, 2023

Why fish don’t have feet

Expiscated on May 7, 2023

A monolithic dump

Pumped and dumped on April 30, 2023

Being a little bit taller

Racked on April 16, 2023

The day ended before it began

Endorsed on March 19, 2023

Landing head-first in March

Made it on March 5, 2023

The house that Pnårp built

Stacked like cordwood on February 5, 2023

A mystery of hasps and coat hangers

Fastened on January 29, 2023

Thinking for myself

Cerebrated on January 22, 2023

No more barriers to cross

Surpassed on January 15, 2023

Feeling rather non-Euclidean

Knotted on January 8, 2023

I am my thoughts… I am time

Annuated on January 1, 2023

Toppings on the bottom?

Bottomed out on December 18, 2022

Al Gore: A User’s Manual

Peered at on December 4, 2022

You are a crazy person

Maddened on November 20, 2022

A draught horse, serendipity, and a bankruptcy

Forstraught on October 30, 2022

Autumn had arrived

Floundered on October 16, 2022

Pinguid penguins, disparate parrots, and a Studebaker

Basted on August 28, 2022

Catastrophes—but no anastrophe

Mishappened on August 14, 2022

Up to my ass in alligators

Endangered on August 7, 2022

Squirrels, squeeorling, syrup of squill, and squee

Cocked up on July 24, 2022

A stack of dictionaries, a goat, and the ensuing manure

Stacked high on June 26, 2022

Whittling the knittery

Quavered on May 8, 2022

A hilarious pair of ducks

Redpilled on March 13, 2022

An arduous, odorous, ordurous affair

Cannibalized on February 27, 2022

Interwoven threads of witless boobery

Spiked on February 20, 2022

Three-eyed gnomes, a lighthouse, and a pair of feet

Erred on February 13, 2022

Nothing happened

Obliviated on January 9, 2022

Collecting the caps from every bottle of light cream

Collected before December 26, 2021

Vigorously shaking every Solanum dulcamara

Vigorously shook before December 19, 2021

Vigorously shaking every ficus tree

Shook before December 12, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Today I was being a…

Squirreled on August 8, 2021

Not a typewriter

Tabulated on July 25, 2021

Another day, another pig war

Splined on June 20, 2021

A dire problem of diphthongs and diacritics

Ired on May 16, 2021

200,000 flip-flop–related injuries

Discalceated on May 9, 2021

The Hanes–Heinz problem

Caught up on May 2, 2021

From Commodus to Vespasian—

Detruded on April 11, 2021

A costly, costive dilemma

Clystered on April 4, 2021

An arpeggio for Snarpegon

Spatchcocked on March 28, 2021

Maybe it was the location

Tripped out on March 21, 2021

Toiling away smoilishly

Toiled away on March 14, 2021

With a bubble and a squeak…

Bubbled and squeaked on March 7, 2021

Christmas, goats, and the fiscal cliff

Goat got on December 30, 2012

Horses, drugs, and some Volvos

Revolved around December 2, 2012

A paean to funnels

Funneled on November 25, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

The geese were angry

Angered before November 4, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

Illin’ in the ileum

Chillin’ on September 16, 2012

A sojourn through the jejunum

Catabolized on September 9, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

My skin was thinking

Considered for June 3, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

I was dead

Expired around February 26, 2012

Seven point one hundred

Released on February 5, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

A jaunt to Washington, D.C.

Filibustered on December 4, 2011

Goatburping and speechifying

Blustered about before November 20, 2011

A paean to panic

Glibbered about on September 25, 2011

Just so he could moo at someone

Percolated on July 3, 2011

The end of doodlewhacker pie

Bloomed on June 26, 2011

Hnnnngggghhhh!

Strained on May 1, 2011

The tight, grimacing face

Impacted before April 17, 2011

Rotating in place

Caligulated on March 20, 2011

A dark and Strommy night

Thurmonned on February 27, 2011

A dark and spammy night

LARTed on February 20, 2011

Requiem for a triangular briefcase

Immured on January 30, 2011

Mr. Årp goes to city hall

Carpetbagged on November 14, 2010

Ollanthorpe Memorial Hospital

Atrophied before October 10, 2010

Gnomes destroying my brain and kidneys

Urinated on on July 18, 2010

eBGIQ7ZuuiU or bust

Gassed up on May 18, 2008

Snuffle off to Buffalo

Sniffled at on November 4, 2007

Paisley time

Enslaved on June 17, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Last decree

Decreed on April 15, 2007

No one expects the Schmalkaldic League

Vanquished on February 25, 2007

Suing Alyssa Milano

Bombarded after January 14, 2007

The Great Fluffernutter Deluge of ’58

Whored out on December 10, 2006

The wall gong exhibition

Molested on June 11, 2006

Stewing in my own juices

Brewed on November 13, 2005

Is there an underdog in you?

Nitrated on July 18, 1999

The triangular briefcase I had found

Reintegrated on June 13, 1999