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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning alcohol

Purple prose asphyxia

Blockaded on May 26, 2024

A vernally hibernal good time

Drove on March 24, 2024

There’s a joke in here somewhere

Pedicured on March 17, 2024

Morning again?

Mourned on February 11, 2024

The splaying of resplendent splendiferousness

Cobbled together on December 31, 2023

Whitewalls, chromedomes, and an asshat with jingle bells

Whitened on December 24, 2023

A quacking bush

Bushwhacked on November 12, 2023

For want of a letterbox

Shackled on October 1, 2023

By fish or by Finn

Finished after September 10, 2023

Corn gone bacon and eggs

Consterned on September 3, 2023

Negotiating a goats-for-oats deal

Abnegated on August 20, 2023

Playing a katydid like a fiddle

Diddled on August 6, 2023

Today I was being even more, more or less

Been on July 2, 2023

Gearless largesse and rageless eelgrass

Snorkeled on June 11, 2023

Landing head-first in March

Made it on March 5, 2023

To catch a fly

Lashed on February 26, 2023

My spaghetti trees had all flowered

Disassembled on February 19, 2023

No more barriers to cross

Surpassed on January 15, 2023

Change you can be leaf in

Bogged down on November 13, 2022

“If” is the middle word in “life”

Horrified on September 11, 2022

The long, greasy road

Lubed up on July 3, 2022

A squiddy meal, a goosey girl, and moles of gnomes

Wriggled on June 5, 2022

Whittling the knittery

Quavered on May 8, 2022

Interwoven threads of witless boobery

Spiked on February 20, 2022

Three-eyed gnomes, a lighthouse, and a pair of feet

Erred on February 13, 2022

Carpathian Carpentry Gnomes? In my kitchen?

Hammered on February 6, 2022

Confound delivery

Starched on January 16, 2022

New years and new neighbors

Bunted on January 2, 2022

Collecting the caps from every bottle of light cream

Collected before December 26, 2021

Vigorously shaking every Solanum dulcamara

Vigorously shook before December 19, 2021

Shouting at every houseplant

Shouted at before December 5, 2021

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

The Dingleberry–Hampsterist–Schmarnocks war

Embattled on November 21, 2021

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

Plantago delenda est

Planted on October 17, 2021

Dugong, budong, hotdog, and hoe

Frowned at on October 3, 2021

Losing weight at the lost-and-found

Bonked on September 19, 2021

And then I’ll fart one more time, and…

Intruded upon August 29, 2021

Time to draw the bull

Ejaculated on August 1, 2021

Not a typewriter

Tabulated on July 25, 2021

José Vargas de las Joyas Matemáticas

Divided by zero on June 13, 2021

An infinite pie

Unbounded on June 6, 2021

Too many Sundays

Quintupled on May 30, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

A costly, costive dilemma

Clystered on April 4, 2021

An arpeggio for Snarpegon

Spatchcocked on March 28, 2021

Maybe it was the location

Tripped out on March 21, 2021

Toiling away smoilishly

Toiled away on March 14, 2021

This coming Friday…

Prognosticated after December 16, 2012

Horses, drugs, and some Volvos

Revolved around December 2, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

Ungabungabugandabunga!

Land-locked on November 11, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

My competitive worm charming days

Vermiculated on August 26, 2012

The turtle herds of insomnia

NōDōz’d on August 12, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

A lunchable lemony apple key

Open-appled on April 22, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

To order a coffee

Caffeinated on March 25, 2012

Axons across beard-seconds of darkness

Stretched out February 19, 2012

A Ho-Mg-Zn icosahedral quasicrystal

Fractured on February 12, 2012

Seven point one hundred

Released on February 5, 2012

Thoughts diverging from reality

Converging on January 29, 2012

A jaunt to Washington, D.C.

Filibustered on December 4, 2011

Squee! Squee! Squee!

Snoozed on October 9, 2011

A snootful of donuts

Imbibed before October 2, 2011

The toadskin kazoo

Toads skinned on September 4, 2011

A stick of pepperoni a day

Bordured on August 21, 2011

The end of doodlewhacker pie

Bloomed on June 26, 2011

Dyssynergic defecation

Splashed down on April 24, 2011

The tight, grimacing face

Impacted before April 17, 2011

Ravna and a tub of port wine cheese spread

Slathered all over on November 21, 2010

Death by simultaneous drowning and dehydration

Dumbled for August 29, 2010

Noshing on my favorite keyboard

Fluttered on July 4, 2010

Do, guppy, guppy!

Guppied on May 4, 2008

Today is January 27

Punched on January 27, 2008

Under Pam & Meg’s

Delved under on September 9, 2007

Music erupted from my bed cushions again

Strafed on January 7, 2007

Jacking off Jill to a squirrel-fox-dingo

Hypothesized on November 5, 2006

Incipient garden gnomes pouring down again

Wined & dined on August 6, 2006

The haberdashery, act II

Flaunted on March 12, 2006

The perfunctory margin of disbelief

Apprenticed to May 9, 1999