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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning flatulence

Two halves of a bagel

Misaligned on July 31, 2022

A wanted carton of wontons

Trotted out on April 10, 2022

The stars screamed at me, but why?

Shredded on March 6, 2022

Carpathian Carpentry Gnomes? In my kitchen?

Hammered on February 6, 2022

Hard avocados and soft stones

Ripened on January 23, 2022

Confound delivery

Starched on January 16, 2022

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

Plantago delenda est

Planted on October 17, 2021

And then I’ll fart one more time, and…

Intruded upon August 29, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Another day, another pig war

Splined on June 20, 2021

A costly, costive dilemma

Clystered on April 4, 2021

Toiling away smoilishly

Toiled away on March 14, 2021

This coming Friday…

Prognosticated after December 16, 2012

A paean to funnels

Funneled on November 25, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

Ungabungabugandabunga!

Land-locked on November 11, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

The ÅSS Goose from the Machine

Bageled on July 22, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

A trip to southern Moravia

Plunged off a cliff on November 27, 2011

Like a herd of turtles

Frightened on November 6, 2011

A paean to panic

Glibbered about on September 25, 2011

Just so he could moo at someone

Percolated on July 3, 2011

The end of doodlewhacker pie

Bloomed on June 26, 2011

Today being Mamårp’s day

Smothered on May 8, 2011

Sigmund Freud would be proud

Electrified on April 3, 2011

A vainglorious, hooting, tooting Christmas

Clamored about on December 26, 2010

Happy birthday, Alyssa Milano!

Feet worshipped on December 19, 2010

Mr. Årp goes to city hall

Carpetbagged on November 14, 2010

A crater full of Volvos

Hidden in ice for centuries on October 31, 2010

Phbthphbthphbthphbththth!

Flatulated on October 3, 2010

Technicolor horse testicles

Nuked on June 27, 2010

Alyssa Milano & the new adventures of Hitler

Snickerdickered on March 30, 2008

Gra, trained assassin

Unchained after March 23, 2008

Pnårp’s in space

Station-kept on September 30, 2007

Why does the pi float?

Floated by on September 23, 2007

3,600 eigenserfs and a function key

Indentured forever after July 8, 2007

Alyssa Milano lives!

Jury-rigged on February 4, 2007

Alyssa Milano v. Phillip Norbert Årp

Entrenched under January 28, 2007

Fort Flabberwocky was a myth!

Auld acquaintances forgotten on December 31, 2006

Gnomelandia Day

Filleted on October 15, 2006

A disastrous pie-eating contest

Drawn and quartered on July 16, 2006

Captain Pinnfarb explains it all

Positioned left of June 18, 2006

The return of the garden gnomes

Star-spangled high above September 25, 2005

What an Englebee Trooble is

Incarcerated on June 12, 2005

I forgot about Hitler

Plundered shortly after October 3, 1999