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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning pigs

You are a crazy person

Maddened on November 20, 2022

With a ploot, ploot, ploot!

Born on November 6, 2022

I wish my spoons were stronger

Snooped on October 23, 2022

“If” is the middle word in “life”

Horrified on September 11, 2022

History looked at me this week

Transported on September 4, 2022

On any given day

Plotted and schemed on August 21, 2022

Catastrophes—but no anastrophe

Mishappened on August 14, 2022

Up to my ass in alligators

Endangered on August 7, 2022

Two halves of a bagel

Misaligned on July 31, 2022

A stack of dictionaries, a goat, and the ensuing manure

Stacked high on June 26, 2022

Wernicke, Broca, and a two-week, drug-fueled bender

Refueled on June 19, 2022

Fleas, flies, and friars!

Peddled on June 12, 2022

A squiddy meal, a goosey girl, and moles of gnomes

Wriggled on June 5, 2022

Flogging the dinosaur

Flailed around on May 1, 2022

A stubby little short week

Trolloped around on April 24, 2022

A curious nine-day week

Dialed on April 3, 2022

Seven point two hundred

Committed on March 27, 2022

The twentieth best day of my life

Easily understood on March 20, 2022

A hilarious pair of ducks

Redpilled on March 13, 2022

The stars screamed at me, but why?

Shredded on March 6, 2022

An arduous, odorous, ordurous affair

Cannibalized on February 27, 2022

Interwoven threads of witless boobery

Spiked on February 20, 2022

Vigorously shaking every ficus tree

Shook before December 12, 2021

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

Dugong, budong, hotdog, and hoe

Frowned at on October 3, 2021

Losing weight at the lost-and-found

Bonked on September 19, 2021

The pink, sticky day ended

Chaptered and versed on September 12, 2021

And then I’ll fart one more time, and…

Intruded upon August 29, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

Time to draw the bull

Ejaculated on August 1, 2021

My arm just follows them

Detached on July 11, 2021

An Independence Day to remember

In the pants on July 4, 2021

To narfle the gömböc

Balanced on June 27, 2021

Another day, another pig war

Splined on June 20, 2021

An infinite pie

Unbounded on June 6, 2021

The Hanes–Heinz problem

Caught up on May 2, 2021

Something breakfasty and sausage-like

Baconated on April 25, 2021

Keeping those goats down in the hole

Bored on April 18, 2021

A costly, costive dilemma

Clystered on April 4, 2021

Mooey, mooey, moo!

Lowed at on December 9, 2012

In my own back yard

Extirpated on September 30, 2012

My competitive worm charming days

Vermiculated on August 26, 2012

Planet of the geese

Honked at on July 15, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

My skin was thinking

Considered for June 3, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

Hoarsely the Pnårp sang

Horsed around on May 13, 2012

A box! A box! A box of…

Puttered about on April 15, 2012

Axons across beard-seconds of darkness

Stretched out February 19, 2012

Seven point one hundred

Released on February 5, 2012

Thoughts converging toward reality

Diverging from January 22, 2012

And then the cold cuts danced

Ronpauled on January 15, 2012

A sally to the Kremlin

Red squared on December 11, 2011

A jaunt to Washington, D.C.

Filibustered on December 4, 2011

A trip to southern Moravia

Plunged off a cliff on November 27, 2011

Cool beans

Beaned on March 27, 2011

Rotating in place

Caligulated on March 20, 2011

Pnårp.com!

Crossing Pnårp Road on March 13, 2011

The hobnailery on Hobgoblin Street

Borfnagled on March 6, 2011

A dark and Strommy night

Thurmonned on February 27, 2011

A dark and stormy night

Stormdrained on February 6, 2011

Back to Pam & Meg’s

Goatmulched on December 12, 2010

375 gorillas and some flower pots

Dumbstruck on November 28, 2010

A crater full of Volvos

Hidden in ice for centuries on October 31, 2010

Gnomes destroying my brain and kidneys

Urinated on on July 18, 2010

Joyful Sefernday, everyone!

Envisaged on June 6, 2010

I had eggs today!

Oviposited on April 18, 2010

A plan is hatched

Hatched right before April 4, 2010

Ham by the brick

Mechanically extracted on March 28, 2010

Return from the Brundlebeyond

Disgorged on March 7, 2010

Gra, trained assassin

Unchained after March 23, 2008

Suddenly ablaze

Ignited on March 9, 2008

Today is January 27

Prevaricated on January 27, 2008

Gnomes? In my kettles?

Nonsensed at January 20, 2008

Why does the pi float?

Floated by on September 23, 2007

I did not forget about Hitler!

Livingroomed on August 12, 2007

Plårp goes home

Sent home on August 5, 2007

Paisley time

Enslaved on June 17, 2007

Ol’ Grummie’s back!

Bungled up on June 3, 2007

Ravna and a ligature

Magic-marked on May 20, 2007

Alyssa Milano lives!

Jury-rigged on February 4, 2007

Suing Alyssa Milano

Bombarded after January 14, 2007

Bloviating and brachiating

Wrenched away from me on December 3, 2006

Britney Spears… or Jennifer Love Hewitt?

Rigorously proved for November 26, 2006

Loquisha, you hornswoggler!

Added to taste on October 29, 2006

The haberdashery, act IV

Wanted on March 26, 2006

The haberdashery, act III

Haunted on March 19, 2006

The haberdashery, act II

Flaunted on March 12, 2006

The haberdashery, act I

Taunted on March 5, 2006

Ham and eggs, a dram of megs

Hammed up for February 26, 2006

I need a new hobby

Telephoned on February 19, 2006

The perfect symmetry of a letter

Excreted slightly before December 18, 2005

I’m ending it all!

Spindled on August 21, 2005

The Trooble Foundation

Irked on April 17, 2005

I saw an iMac, a greenish-blue flavored one

Optimized for April 10, 2005

Curse inflatable hotdogs

Expurgated on January 23, 2005

Hypoglycemia and digititis have no sway over me

Intubated on May 30, 1999