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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning God

Pinguid penguins, disparate parrots, and a Studebaker

Basted on August 28, 2022

Catastrophes—but no anastrophe

Mishappened on August 14, 2022

The long, greasy road

Lubed up on July 3, 2022

A squiddy meal, a goosey girl, and moles of gnomes

Wriggled on June 5, 2022

Carpathian Carpentry Gnomes? In my kitchen?

Hammered on February 6, 2022

New years and new neighbors

Bunted on January 2, 2022

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

An out-of-place trashcan

Recycled on November 14, 2021

To muffle up a gooſe

Muffled up on October 31, 2021

José Vargas de las Joyas Matemáticas

Divided by zero on June 13, 2021

Great Dane or greatest Dane?

Deigned on May 23, 2021

A dire problem of diphthongs and diacritics

Ired on May 16, 2021

Something breakfasty and sausage-like

Baconated on April 25, 2021

An arpeggio for Snarpegon

Spatchcocked on March 28, 2021

Maybe it was the location

Tripped out on March 21, 2021

Christmas, goats, and the fiscal cliff

Goat got on December 30, 2012

This coming Friday…

Prognosticated after December 16, 2012

Horses, drugs, and some Volvos

Revolved around December 2, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

The nauga war

Tanned on October 14, 2012

Meals and utensils and straws, oh my!

Bluely rinsed on October 7, 2012

A sojourn through the jejunum

Catabolized on September 9, 2012

My competitive worm charming days

Vermiculated on August 26, 2012

Upon the Fimbriated Planet

Flabbled about on August 5, 2012

And the neckties writhed

Spiraled around July 29, 2012

The ÅSS Goose from the Machine

Bageled on July 22, 2012

Planet of the geese

Honked at on July 15, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

The Bagel Nebula, you stinky monkeys!

Humped and dumped on June 17, 2012

I am the humperdumperdink!

Dumped and dinked on June 10, 2012

My skin was thinking

Considered for June 3, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

The death of Argo Navis

Trisected before April 29, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

To order a coffee

Caffeinated on March 25, 2012

I was dead

Expired around February 26, 2012

And then the cold cuts danced

Ronpauled on January 15, 2012

A sleigh ride to the North Pole

Kringled on December 25, 2011

A trip to southern Moravia

Plunged off a cliff on November 27, 2011

Schtumpfenfrumpt!

Stumped on October 16, 2011

The toadskin kazoo

Toads skinned on September 4, 2011

What the heck… is bothering me?

Chanted on June 12, 2011

Potted meat

Unpotted on June 5, 2011

Hnnnngggghhhh!

Strained on May 1, 2011

A dark and smarmy night

Self-satisfied on February 13, 2011

In feckless search of a new body

Transplanted before January 23, 2011

The Christ-O-Mart on Crunkner Boulevard

Transubstantiated before January 16, 2011

Dr. Unterguggenburgerheimer!

Diagnosed on January 9, 2011

Fluffernutter… or treacle?

Stickied on January 2, 2011

Happy birthday, Alyssa Milano!

Feet worshipped on December 19, 2010

Phbthphbthphbthphbththth!

Flatulated on October 3, 2010

Parndiddle McForsterbaster

Pinned up on September 5, 2010

Ah, the first of August!

Firstly on August 1, 2010

Boom! Boom, boom, boom!

Orbited on July 11, 2010

Thousands of Eggmen against one little Pnårp

Destalinized on May 2, 2010

The Fendippitous Eggmen

Cracked open on April 25, 2010

Return from the Brundlebeyond

Disgorged on March 7, 2010

Dog whelks in your arteries

Derived on July 6, 2008

Do, guppy, guppy!

Guppied on May 4, 2008

Today is January 27

Prevaricated on January 27, 2008

Gnomes? In my kettles?

Nonsensed at January 20, 2008

Lo’ Kweeisha

Pornographed on January 13, 2008

Pnårp’s in space

Station-kept on September 30, 2007

Why do the stars scream?

Screamed about on September 16, 2007

Paisley time

Enslaved on June 17, 2007

131,072 Schmongeloid conscripts

Decimated on March 4, 2007

The Great Fluffernutter Deluge of ’58

Whored out on December 10, 2006

New Gardegnomia

Navigated to on July 30, 2006

This is Phillip Norbert Årp’s ship

Appeased prior to July 2, 2006

Gormless bastard!

Located to the right of June 25, 2006

I thought this was better!?

Harvested before May 28, 2006

I still don’t trust these cookies…

Hollered well before May 14, 2006

Hobnobbishly bamboozled, she said

Interrupted before February 5, 2006

I shall visit Eigentoria

Bandied about on October 30, 2005

The return of the garden gnomes

Star-spangled high above September 25, 2005

Incipient garden gnomes pouring down

Shined & enshrined on June 19, 2005

What an Englebee Trooble is

Incarcerated on June 12, 2005

The Trooble Foundation

Irked on April 17, 2005

My dear brother Grårp!

Crucified for March 13, 2005

Aaaahhh!!

Vindicated and tabulated on November 7, 1999

Someone accused me of screwing a pheasant

Remixed before September 12, 1999