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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning hamsters

Miscounting the protons

Demisemiquavered on May 22, 2022

A curious nine-day week

Dialed on April 3, 2022

An arduous, odorous, ordurous affair

Cannibalized on February 27, 2022

Interwoven threads of witless boobery

Spiked on February 20, 2022

The door slammed in my face

Slammed on January 30, 2022

Collecting the caps from every bottle of light cream

Collected before December 26, 2021

An adventure in Dingleberry–Dumpsterism

Dumped and stirred on November 28, 2021

The Dingleberry–Hampsterist–Schmarnocks war

Embattled on November 21, 2021

Dugong, budong, hotdog, and hoe

Frowned at on October 3, 2021

Excrescence and excreta

Unfolded on September 26, 2021

And then I’ll fart one more time, and…

Intruded upon August 29, 2021

To not be a six-foot-tall man–squirrel

Squeeorled on August 15, 2021

In my own back yard

Extirpated on September 30, 2012

The September that wouldn’t be

Elided on September 2, 2012

The turtle herds of insomnia

NōDōz’d on August 12, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

My neighbor—he’s on fire

Detonated on May 27, 2012

The green apple bee-bop

Hydrated on May 20, 2012

The death of Argo Navis

Trisected before April 29, 2012

Toad rental—cheap!

Rented on March 18, 2012

A Ho-Mg-Zn icosahedral quasicrystal

Fractured on February 12, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

Like a herd of turtles

Frightened on November 6, 2011

Gnomes? In my photocopier?

Litigated before September 18, 2011

A stick of pepperoni a day

Bordured on August 21, 2011

The day ended

Gibbered about on August 7, 2011

Just shaving the dog

Preened on July 31, 2011

Incipits being rather popish

Lubricated on May 22, 2011

Reflecting on corn gone wrong

Paroled on May 15, 2011

The tight, grimacing face

Impacted before April 17, 2011

Cool beans

Beaned on March 27, 2011

A dark and Strommy night

Thurmonned on February 27, 2011

Requiem for a triangular briefcase

Immured on January 30, 2011

In feckless search of a new body

Transplanted before January 23, 2011

Happy birthday, Alyssa Milano!

Feet worshipped on December 19, 2010

Ollanthorpe Memorial Hospital

Atrophied before October 10, 2010

Phbthphbthphbthphbththth!

Flatulated on October 3, 2010

Death by simultaneous drowning and dehydration

Dumbled for August 29, 2010

Tater-totting crunkfire

Clapped on… clapped off on August 22, 2010

The disastrous ballad of Monica Lewinski’s feet

Shattered before August 15, 2010

The fleeting nuances of Dingleberry–Hampsterism

Guzzled on May 9, 2010

Dingleberry champion hamster

Plotted against on March 21, 2010

The one true goddess!

Duffeled on November 18, 2007

Snuffle off to Buffalo

Sniffled at on November 4, 2007

Strahazazhia smiles upon me

Gone wrong on October 28, 2007

Pnårp’s in space

Station-kept on September 30, 2007

Why do the stars scream?

Screamed about on September 16, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Homage

Legislated on April 8, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Taxes

Propagated on April 1, 2007

The laws of Phillip I

Promulgated on March 25, 2007

The restive provinces conquered

Excoriated before March 18, 2007

Bloviating and brachiating

Wrenched away from me on December 3, 2006

Mesothelioma in a drainage ditch

Stir-fried for October 22, 2006

Gnomelandia Day

Filleted on October 15, 2006

Ollanthorpe Savings Bank

Puréed on October 1, 2006

The dingleberry/hamster song

Sung for April 30, 2006

The haberdashery, act III

Haunted on March 19, 2006

Today being Christmas…

Made merry on December 25, 2005

Shitlingthorpe–Alabaster Flapdoodles

Zanzibarred on December 11, 2005

Dingleberry, hamster!

Cornpuffed for November 27, 2005

My house burned down today

Incinerated on November 20, 2005

The return of the garden gnomes

Star-spangled high above September 25, 2005