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Pnårp’s docile & perfunctory page

Entries mentioning death

This coming Friday…

Prognosticated after December 16, 2012

Mooey, mooey, moo!

Lowed at on December 9, 2012

A parable that should explain everything

Enchanted on November 18, 2012

Ungabungabugandabunga!

Land-locked on November 11, 2012

The geese were angry

Angered before November 4, 2012

Ziti—with lines, please

Lollygagged on October 28, 2012

The nauga war

Tanned on October 14, 2012

In my own back yard

Extirpated on September 30, 2012

Livin’ large in the large intestine

Emboweled on September 23, 2012

Illin’ in the ileum

Chillin’ on September 16, 2012

A sojourn through the jejunum

Catabolized on September 9, 2012

My competitive worm charming days

Vermiculated on August 26, 2012

Upon the Fimbriated Planet

Flabbled about on August 5, 2012

And the neckties writhed

Spiraled around July 29, 2012

The ÅSS Goose from the Machine

Bageled on July 22, 2012

Planet of the geese

Honked at on July 15, 2012

Here I froze and here I died

Dubstepped on July 8, 2012

A hortensical Sefernday

Hortensed on July 1, 2012

Fungous hitchhikers from outer space

Rocketed on June 24, 2012

The Bagel Nebula, you stinky monkeys!

Humped and dumped on June 17, 2012

I am the humperdumperdink!

Dumped and dinked on June 10, 2012

My skin was thinking

Considered for June 3, 2012

Hoarsely the Pnårp sang

Horsed around on May 13, 2012

Vox clamantis in deserto

Cheddared on May 6, 2012

The death of Argo Navis

Trisected before April 29, 2012

A lunchable lemony apple key

Open-appled on April 22, 2012

Gurning for two

Faces made before April 8, 2012

Surviving April Fools Day

Foxholed on April 1, 2012

To order a coffee

Caffeinated on March 25, 2012

Toad rental—cheap!

Rented on March 18, 2012

Yup, still dead…

Rotted around March 11, 2012

I was still dead…

Putresced around March 4, 2012

I was dead

Expired around February 26, 2012

Axons across beard-seconds of darkness

Stretched out February 19, 2012

A Ho-Mg-Zn icosahedral quasicrystal

Fractured on February 12, 2012

Seven point one hundred

Released on February 5, 2012

Thoughts diverging from reality

Converging on January 29, 2012

Thoughts converging toward reality

Diverging from January 22, 2012

And then the cold cuts danced

Ronpauled on January 15, 2012

Dreams in a hole in the ground

Trespassed before January 1, 2012

A sleigh ride to the North Pole

Kringled on December 25, 2011

A journey to upper Silesia

Gruelled on December 18, 2011

A sally to the Kremlin

Red squared on December 11, 2011

A jaunt to Washington, D.C.

Filibustered on December 4, 2011

A trip to southern Moravia

Plunged off a cliff on November 27, 2011

Goatburping and speechifying

Blustered about before November 20, 2011

Grunting and squeaking in the goatburping park

Soil sampled on November 13, 2011

Like a herd of turtles

Frightened on November 6, 2011

Fimbriated armless and legless

Charged on October 30, 2011

Schtumpfenfrumpt!

Stumped on October 16, 2011

A snootful of donuts

Imbibed before October 2, 2011

A paean to panic

Glibbered about on September 25, 2011

Gnomes? In my photocopier?

Litigated before September 18, 2011

Ten years

Hijacked on September 11, 2011

The toadskin kazoo

Toads skinned on September 4, 2011

Uneventful, boring, and bland

Nothing happened on August 28, 2011

The day ended

Gibbered about on August 7, 2011

Just shaving the dog

Preened on July 31, 2011

The harooloos grew closer

Repositioned on July 17, 2011

Moobly Sefernday!

Borndwiddied on June 19, 2011

What the heck… is bothering me?

Chanted on June 12, 2011

Potted meat

Unpotted on June 5, 2011

Reflecting on corn gone wrong

Paroled on May 15, 2011

Today being Mamårp’s day

Smothered on May 8, 2011

Dyssynergic defecation

Splashed down on April 24, 2011

Plårp and I did our best

Potted on April 10, 2011

Sigmund Freud would be proud

Electrified on April 3, 2011

Cool beans

Beaned on March 27, 2011

Rotating in place

Caligulated on March 20, 2011

Pnårp.com!

Crossing Pnårp Road on March 13, 2011

The hobnailery on Hobgoblin Street

Borfnagled on March 6, 2011

A dark and Strommy night

Thurmonned on February 27, 2011

Requiem for a triangular briefcase

Immured on January 30, 2011

In feckless search of a new body

Transplanted before January 23, 2011

The Christ-O-Mart on Crunkner Boulevard

Transubstantiated before January 16, 2011

Fluffernutter… or treacle?

Stickied on January 2, 2011

Back to Pam & Meg’s

Goatmulched on December 12, 2010

An alabasterously magnificent find

Found before December 5, 2010

375 gorillas and some flower pots

Dumbstruck on November 28, 2010

Oatmeal cookies… behind it all!

Completely forgotten on November 7, 2010

A crater full of Volvos

Hidden in ice for centuries on October 31, 2010

The frozen Pnårp

Last thing I remembered on October 24, 2010

Harshbarger Memorial Hospital

Discharged on October 17, 2010

An offer he couldn’t refuse

Unmitigated on September 26, 2010

Skipping Wednesday

Slid past on September 12, 2010

Parndiddle McForsterbaster

Pinned up on September 5, 2010

Death by simultaneous drowning and dehydration

Dumbled for August 29, 2010

Tater-totting crunkfire

Clapped on… clapped off on August 22, 2010

The disastrous ballad of Monica Lewinski’s feet

Shattered before August 15, 2010

Two stumblebums for Phillip Norbert Årp

Stumbled around on August 8, 2010

Gnomes destroying my brain and kidneys

Urinated on on July 18, 2010

Boom! Boom, boom, boom!

Orbited on July 11, 2010

Noshing on my favorite keyboard

Fluttered on July 4, 2010

PNARP.SYS is an evil, vile thing

Disinfected on June 20, 2010

Oh, the serendipity!

Squelched through on May 30, 2010

A little pedicatio

Irrumated on May 16, 2010

Thousands of Eggmen against one little Pnårp

Destalinized on May 2, 2010

The fnord plan

Executed before April 11, 2010

Ham by the brick

Mechanically extracted on March 28, 2010

Dingleberry champion hamster

Plotted against on March 21, 2010

A Hilarius pair of ducks

Guffawed at after March 14, 2010

Into the Brundlesphere

Descended upon on August 3, 2008

Through the tunnel

Crossed over on July 27, 2008

Dog whelks in your arteries

Derived on July 6, 2008

The perfunctory margin of disbelief, part II

Reified on June 29, 2008

Crossing the hatches

Pasteurized for June 22, 2008

Glick Glick van der Glick again!

Cocked and blocked on June 15, 2008

Requiem for a haberdasher

Eulogized on June 8, 2008

Glick Glick van der Glick

Cocked and locked on June 1, 2008

Do, guppy, guppy!

Guppied on May 4, 2008

Dying planktonic foraminifera

Rained down on April 13, 2008

Alyssa Milano & the new adventures of Hitler

Snickerdickered on March 30, 2008

Gra, trained assassin

Unchained after March 23, 2008

Suddenly ablaze

Ignited on March 9, 2008

Not so dead again

Recomposed right before March 2, 2008

Dead again

Decomposed after February 24, 2008

A whole pile of flapdoodles from Shitlingthorpe

Recollected on February 17, 2008

A pox upon your whizgiggling!

Avenged on February 10, 2008

A whiz and a giggle

Whizgiggled at on February 3, 2008

Today is January 27

Prevaricated on January 27, 2008

Gnomes? In my kettles?

Nonsensed at January 20, 2008

Lo’ Kweeisha

Pornographed on January 13, 2008

Bubble wrap and bubble butts

Thawed on January 6, 2008

Dead in a hole

Deceased on December 30, 2007

Frozen in a hole

Frostbit on December 23, 2007

Free at last

Self-addressed and stamped on December 2, 2007

The one true goddess!

Duffeled on November 18, 2007

There’s nothing in my head!

Scuffled with on November 11, 2007

Snuffle off to Buffalo

Sniffled at on November 4, 2007

Strahazazhia smiles upon me

Gone wrong on October 28, 2007

The deep blue face of failure

Done wrong on October 21, 2007

Graceful as Loquisha’s soles

Danced with on October 14, 2007

This is Phillip Norbert Årp’s spaceship

Diseased prior to October 7, 2007

Pnårp’s in space

Station-kept on September 30, 2007

Under Pam & Meg’s

Delved under on September 9, 2007

Grumfeld redux

Simmered on September 2, 2007

Indeed I can go home again

Returned home on August 26, 2007

Dugongs abound in my ear canals!

Tiled over on August 19, 2007

I did not forget about Hitler!

Livingroomed on August 12, 2007

Plårp goes home

Sent home on August 5, 2007

Plårp, Plårp, Plårp!

Lopped off on July 29, 2007

Plårp!

Plopped down on July 15, 2007

3,600 eigenserfs and a function key

Indentured forever after July 8, 2007

Press any key

Pressed on June 24, 2007

Paisley time

Enslaved on June 17, 2007

Ol’ Grummie’s back!

Bungled up on June 3, 2007

Ravna and a ligature

Magic-marked on May 20, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Last decree

Decreed on April 15, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Homage

Legislated on April 8, 2007

The laws of Phillip I: Taxes

Propagated on April 1, 2007

The laws of Phillip I

Promulgated on March 25, 2007

The restive provinces conquered

Excoriated before March 18, 2007

Eight years

Anniversed four days before March 11, 2007

131,072 Schmongeloid conscripts

Decimated on March 4, 2007

Alyssa Milano lives!

Jury-rigged on February 4, 2007

Alyssa Milano v. Phillip Norbert Årp

Entrenched under January 28, 2007

Suing Alyssa Milano

Bombarded after January 14, 2007

Fort Flabberwocky was a myth!

Auld acquaintances forgotten on December 31, 2006

’Twas the night before Christmas

Prostituted on December 24, 2006

The Spend-O-Mart on Crunkner Boulevard

Drenched in sweat on December 17, 2006

Bloviating and brachiating

Wrenched away from me on December 3, 2006

Gnomelandia Day

Filleted on October 15, 2006

Ollanthorpe Savings Bank

Puréed on October 1, 2006

I remembered a lot this week!

Chopped with a stick on September 24, 2006

Burkina Faso encased in pie

Tortured on July 23, 2006

A cock-up, to be sure

Erected on June 4, 2006

The haberdashery, act IV

Wanted on March 26, 2006

The haberdashery, act II

Flaunted on March 12, 2006

She isn’t dead!

Copulated after January 15, 2006

368,000 firecrackers and a butcher shop

Tarpapered over on January 1, 2006

Today being Christmas…

Made merry on December 25, 2005

The perfect symmetry of a letter

Excreted slightly before December 18, 2005

Shitlingthorpe–Alabaster Flapdoodles

Zanzibarred on December 11, 2005

My house burned down today

Incinerated on November 20, 2005

The return of Grårp

Cordoned off on September 18, 2005

Abortifacient skies, the burning air

Slobbered all over on September 11, 2005

I’m ending it all!

Spindled August 21, 2005

Soft, and steaming lightly

Castigated on July 31, 2005

Umph… plurgh… splat!

Ingratiated on July 17, 2005

Zero-factor linguistics

Laughed about within June 5, 2005

Eigenfactor

Given to charity prior to May 22, 2005

Into the midst of a gorilla and yak pack

Made in Taiwan, R.O.C., before May 15, 2005

I was mad

Optimized for April 3, 2005

Guhhhh noooobity fahhhh foooogity!!!

Squabbled about on March 20, 2005

My dear brother Grårp!

Crucified for March 13, 2005

Contemplating the Spice Girls

Best if sold by February 27, 2005

Searching forever for the elusive Troobles

Squandered because of October 31, 1999

The stars scream at me louder than ever!!

Suspended from October 24, 1999

I had failed

Hidden above my bed on October 17, 1999

A brass knob had fallen on my head

Belched out on September 26, 1999

The Countess-Prelate von Sträsmussenbörg

Bleeped out for September 19, 1999

No kind of Trooble infatuates anyone

Fondled August 22, 1999

I love AOL

Placated since August 1, 1999

Mister Ollanthorpe von Sträsmussenbörg

Encapsulated within July 25, 1999

Is there an underdog in you?

Nitrated on July 18, 1999

Dead

Abolished after July 11, 1999

The flying pi returned

Complicated because of July 4, 1999

I took the AK-47 down

Romanticized for June 20, 1999

Dangerous evidence kept cropping up

Regurgitated prior to May 16, 1999

Am I lost!? Am I low on oil!?

Hydrogenated for April 11, 1999

The man who talked way too much

Splattered on April 4, 1999